Featured Article: Test
This article documents Test's current angle. Although, not the best angle for Test or his athletic ability, it has proven that he is indeed a powerhouse. Written by Mike Fazoli and taken from
T&A...Trouble & Anxiety?
There’s an old saying that one person’s trash is another’s treasure.
While you might not want to suggest that either Test or Albert were ever ready
for the scrap heap, these two former castaways have formed an intimidating team
in search of gold--the World Wrestling Federation Tag Team Championship belts.
T&A may have been born from the rejection of others, but its members are
hardly second-string talent. Pound for pound, there probably isn’t another
Federation tag team that can match Test and Albert in sheer brute strength. Test
checks in at an imposing 6’6”, 282 pounds, and the behemoth Albert at
6’7”, 380 pounds. They’re young, they’re powerful and they’re
dangerous, which begs the question: How did they end up as odd lots in the first
place?
Albert’s case is easy to figure out. Soon after arriving in the Federation,
he found himself under the tutelage of the Big Boss Man. Albert learned every
underhanded trick and move in the book from the Boss Man--but he also learned
that the surly Cobb County, Georgia, veteran is as treacherous as he is wily.
Fearful and perhaps jealous of the monster he had created, Boss Man turned on
Albert, deep-sixing him in favor of Bull Buchanan. True to his reputation, Boss
Man has since sent Bull packing as well. Test’s travails are better-known, and
far more emotionally painful. While Albert had career-based motives for casting
his lot with the Boss Man, Test’s association with the “pre-Helmsley”
Stephanie McMahon came straight from the heart. The former Motley Crue roadie
had a heart of gold. Letting nothing sidetrack his romance with Stephanie, Test
battled Shane McMahon, Triple H and DX for her affections. And when his
“loving fiancée” administered the coup de grace by marrying Triple H
and then leading the McMahon-Helmsley Faction’s savage attacks on him, the
pain drove him off the Federation’s radar screen for months.
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Enter Trish Stratus. The former fitness model came to the Federation digging
for gold, and saw Test and Albert as a powerful means to that end.
“Trish brought us together,” Test says. “She saw the potential in both
of us and teamed us up.” Perhaps sharing similar backgrounds, Test and Albert clicked immediately. And
they both insist that their relationship with their manager begins and ends in
the ring. Recalling his past experience with the deceitful Stephanie, Test is
particularly vehement about keeping things strictly business.
“My business with Trish is just that--business,” he insists. “That’s
it. Albert and I are loyal to each other first. Trish is there to make us look
good. If she can do something to help us, she does it. But it’s business and
nothing else.”
When a man of Test’s size and power puts his foot down, you tend to listen.
But does he protest too much? Business is one thing, but T&A’s actions
suggest that maybe their loyalty to their manager is motivated by more than a
paycheck. The duo shows far more aggression and passion when defending Trish
than simply defending themselves. The Dudley Boyz and the Hardy Boyz have paid
their price for putting their hands on the lovely Diva.
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And if it’s “all about business,” then how can Test possibly explain his complicity in doing the dirty work of the McMahon-Helmsley Faction? While his anger at having to associate with Stephanie and Triple H was apparent, he nonetheless did Trish’s bidding.
“Money talks,” insists Test. But actions speak louder than even the almighty dollar in this case. Both Test and Albert have been badly burned by their blind faith in others and are very cautious about letting themselves be used again. They publicly play the role of mercenaries, motivated more by wealth and personal gain than by loyalty to anyone other than each other. But it has become clear that Trish has enlisted two Superstars who will go to great lengths to protect her and impose her will on others.
With that in mind, the rest of the Federation has been watching with great interest to see Test’s and Albert’s reaction to having to share their manager with the ultimate “alpha male,” Val Venis. Curiously, when Trish was subjected to a long “stinky face” attack by Rikishi, she didn’t turn to T&A for revenge, but to the Big Valbowski.
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Like T&A, Val has also shown a new fire and aggression since associating himself with Trish. By defending her honor and instigating a savage war with Rikishi, Val may have placed himself in the heart and mind of Trish.
With Val on the scene, the painful memories of rejection may be stirring anew for T&A, particularly Test. While he and Albert have been unsuccessful in helping the Faction, Val has played his knight-in-shining-armor role with great success. Many feel that the former adult movie star is a more natural fit with the sultry Diva. Could Test once again be letting his loyalty to a beautiful woman sidetrack him?
There’s no denying that with Trish at their side, Test and Albert are a force to be reckoned with. It’s time for them to realize that the true source of their strength is their loyalty to each other, not to their manager. Misguided loyalties brought Test and Albert together in the first place. If they can maintain their allegiance only to each other and to the success of their team, there should be no stopping them.
But they have to make that choice for themselves. Dumping Trish before she involves them any further with the Faction or any of her personal grudges is certainly the way to go. If, despite their protests, they are indeed loyal to Trish, it’s time to reconsider that misplaced faith. Trish is clearly as scheming as she is beautiful, and T&A would be doomed by placing her personal goals before their own. Let Val Venis do Trish’s dirty work and let T&A move on.
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Few Superstars know this history of betrayal better than Test and Albert. It lies behind them, and now in front of them once again. It’s time for them to finally learn their lesson and grow up.
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